Meet Our Support Staff
“No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.” — Christopher Morley
We hope you’ll agree with our furry friends.
Chomper
Job Title: CEO (Canine Executive Officer)
Years of experience: 4
Does your human play dress up with you? I get to wear jerseys during football games and it’s my favorite thing ever. Titan up!
How does your human celebrate your birthday? Dad says I can't tell mom about the steak...
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? They keep cats around for some reason and it's really upsetting.
Logan
Job Title: Markitty Consultant
Years of experience: 2
Does your name have any special significance? I was a wild and untamed street kitten and Logan reminded my mom of Wolverine, so it seemed appropriate.
Do you have a favorite food? Yes, anything my brother Murphy is eating is my favorite.
What’s your human’s favorite part of having you around? I allow 12.75 minutes per day of cuddle time, and it seems to keep them satisfied.
Murphy the Sphynx
Job Title: Vice Purresident of Operations
Years of experience: 4
Did your human give you a special bed for naps or do you just take over their bed? I have a few but my favorite is an old iMac that’s been gutted out and filled with an electric blanket.
Have you been accepted as an “immediate family member” in your human’s family? I’ve accepted them, if that’s what you mean.
Do you have a favorite toy? Fuzzy thing on a string. It brings out my inner predator. Look out fuzzy thing; I’m comin’ for fuzz.
Ginger
Job Title: Impurrovement Lead
Years of experience: 3
Does your human play dress up with you? Only if they want to die. I had to wear cat’s pajamas after surgery once, and on the last day, I left them somewhere they’ll never be found.
Do you get more presents at Christmas than your human does? Everything under the tree is mine! No one quite understood that last year, but I’ll make them understand next time.
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? They’re always in my seat.
Sir Alex
Job Title: Director of Barketing
Years of experience: 12
Does your name have any special significance? I’m named after Dad’s hero, the long-time manager of Manchester United. That guy was apparently so good at his job, he was knighted.
Do you have any strange personality quirks? I tear the stuffing out of the bottom of my beds. It’s not really a destructive thing. I’m blind and don’t like feeling the ground shift underneath me.
Have you ever destroyed anything in your human’s home? Just every dog bed they’ve given me.
Hurley
Job Title: Content Barketer
Years of experience: 11
Does your name have any special significance? My dad plays an ancient Irish sport called hurling, and the stick he uses is called a hurley.
Can you do any tricks? I can sit, lie down, and halfway roll over. I also know some Gaelic Irish: amach to go out, and isteach to go inside.
Have you ever destroyed anything in your human’s home? Hold on; I kept track of this. An oven mitt, an ottoman leg, an electric blanket cord, and a magazine. Felt like the exact right number of things to destroy.
Fozzy
Job Title: CIO (Chief Infurmation Officer)
Years of experience: 1
How did you and your human meet? He just appeared out of nowhere. He seemed more fun than my siblings.
Have you been accepted as an “immediate family member” in your human’s family? Pretty sure I’m the Golden Child.
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? Training him to give me more treats. He’s doing a much better job though.
Jackie Daytona
Job Title: Solutions Barkitect
Years of experience: 5
Do you have any strange personality quirks? I’m an avid member of the neighborhood watch and will let everyone know when anyone is doing anything outside.
How protective of your human and their family are you? Mmm, not very. I’m likely to peepee myself.
Does your human like to go for car rides? I’m very suspicious of the big metal boxes with wheels.
Luna
Job Title: Senior Treat Inspector
Years of experience: 5
Do you have any strange personality quirks? I’m afraid of everything.
Do you like taking walks? I like to explore when it’s safe, and my shadow doesn’t scare me.
What are your feelings on bath time? No baths. No nail trimming. Just say no.
Peanut
Job Title: Squeakertary
Years of experience: 5
Does your name have any special significance? I look like a peanut butter cup.
Can you do any tricks? See the food? BAM! Now you don’t.
What’s your human’s favorite part of having you around? The little human people laugh when they hold me and enjoy my squeaks.
Sieta
Job Title: Chief Web Developer
Years of experience: 2
What breed are you? I’m a Southern House spider, also known as Kukulcania Hibernalis.
Did your human give you a special bed for naps or do you just take over their bed? I have a home called the Cobweb Castle. That is where I stay.
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? They hover.
Elsa
Job Title: Product Develpupment
Years of experience: 8
How does your human celebrate your birthday? I love cards! I still have mine from this year in my dog bed.
What are your feelings on bath time? Where the bubbles at?!
Have you ever destroyed anything in your human’s home? Area rugs do not belong in this home. I’ve tried telling these people, and they don’t listen.
Fuzzy
Job Title: Department Puppervisor
Years of experience: 4
Did your human give you a special bed for naps or do you just take over their bed? I have two of my own beds but human beds have legs to lay on.
Does your human like to go for car rides? They do, but I get viciously car sick…
Does your human like taking walks? Leashes are the enemy. And scary.
Frodo
Job Title: Pawblic Relations Director
Years of experience: 14
What breed are you? I’m a Chihuahua/Corgi mix.
Can you do any tricks? I’ll do anything you ask as long as there’s a treat involved.
Does your human like taking walks? I walk them instead of the other way around.
Egon
Job Title: HissEO Manager
Years of experience: 7
Do you have any strange personality quirks? I’m really too beautiful to tolerate the humans.
Does your name have any special significance? I was named after Harold Ramis.
Do you get more presents at Christmas than your human does? They think I’m spoiled enough as it is. They couldn’t be more wrong.
Tater
Job Title: Social Media Meowketer
Years of experience: 11
What breed are you? I wear a tuxedo.
How protective of your human and their family are you? I don’t know what danger is.
How did you and your human meet? I was a foster rescue.
Stevezie
Job Title: Purrchasing Director
Years of experience: 6
Does your name have any special significance? I was named after Bill Murray’s character in The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou.
Do you have any strange personality quirks? Maybe all of them. I’m still figuring things out.
Have you ever destroyed anything in your human’s home? I’ll just say if you leave a snack in your purse…I will find it.
Senator Waffles
Job Title: Customer Service Repurresentative
Years of experience: 10
Does your name have any special significance? I was rightly elected by my constituents.
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? Making them feed me at exactly 8am and 5pm. A minute late means death by starvation.
What are your feelings on bath time? I can take care of myself, thank you very much.
Batman
Job Title: User Expurrience Designer
Years of experience: 7
Can you do any tricks? I can balance on top of the flat screen tv on the wall.
How does your human celebrate your birthday? With a new empty box to sit in.
Have you ever destroyed anything in your human’s home? Yes! I’ve done a pretty good job on the sofa. Recently started working on the arm chair.
Merle
Job Title: Purrsonal Assistant
Years of experience: 7
Does your name have any special significance? I’m named after Merle Haggard.
What are your feelings on bath time? Never gonna happen.
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? They make me wear a harness whenever I want to go outside.
Zeus
Job Title: CFO (Chief Fetch Officer)
Years of experience: 6
Can you do any tricks? If you have any treats for me, then yes.
Did your human give you a special bed for naps or do you just take over their bed? I had a bed but I ditched it because I decided his bed is better than mine.
How did you and your human meet? I was born three years ago in his room, right next to his bed at around 9am. As soon as I was able to open my eyes, I adopted him.
Sir MeowMeow Beans
Job Title: Senior Account Meownager
Years of experience: 4
How does your human celebrate your birthday? I don’t know my birthday, so I just make the humans give me treats all the time.
What are your feelings on bath time? I take care of my own baths.
What’s the hardest part of owning a human? I never get enough attention. Why do humans have to work?
Nandito
Job Title: Infurmation Technology
Years of experience: 9
How did you and your human meet? I was adopted 8 years ago from a veterinary medical center. I was the last one who was adopted, my human saw something special about me. He thinks he rescued me, but the rescue was mutual.
Did your human give you a special bed for naps or do you just take over their bed? Yeah, my human gave me his big-sized bed, but I allow him to take naps with me.
How does your human celebrate your birthday? We go to the pet shop to choose what new toys I want!
Goldie
Job Title: CTO (Chief Treat Officer)
Years of experience: 5
Does your name have any special significance? I was part of the “Icon” litter and my brothers and sisters were named “Bowie,” “Prince,” “Tina,” “Dolly,” and “Blondie.”
Can you do any tricks? Still working on my basic training for now but I’m getting better at staying in one place for a while!
What are your feelings on bath time? We have a tense relationship. I’m always intrigued by the sound of the water running but I regret it after getting in the tub.
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